Warning:Isolation is Bad For You
Today, while I was ironing, I felt compelled to put into words all the reasons that were flooding my brain as to why we are not meant to live our lives in isolation and loneliness. In isolation, we die.
I believe an out-right war has been declared on our culture, and we don’t even know it. We compulsively check our phones, ipads, and other devices, and are being robbed of (or willingly giving up) the capacity to engage with real people. This new technological world takes up time, clogs our brains with information overload, and even tricks our hormones into believing we have experienced human connection. Research shows that we literally get hits of the reward hormone, dopamine, as we scroll. You know it, I know it, we all know...so let's go ahead and say it out loud, we are ADDICTED.
Social Media, gaming, and pornography sites give us a "relational" reward without doing any actual relational work. Our bodies and brains are tricked into producing the same hormones we would get from receiving a compliment, a hug, the pleasure of a sexual encounter, the adrenaline of a life/death situation or an adventure. This is so unfortunate because while we may find ourselves content for the moment, we no doubt have this nagging sense of deep loneliness. Not to mention shame and guilt that come with lack of motivation and will power to change. And… then there is the fear of being out of practice when we actually are given the opportunity for face-to-face human interaction. .
Google, Siri, and Pinterest are right at our fingertips… we don’t need to ask anyone for anything. We have become "all-knowing". I could go on and on and ON about all the counterfeit things out there *that are robbing us of the human and relational connection that God created us for, but instead consider with me why It is worth it to fight against this isolation that seems like it is becoming the new norm. (This list is certainly not exhaustive!)
The scripture in Matthew 16:26 makes so much sense right now, Jesus said to his disciples, “What good will it be for someone to gain the whole word, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?”
· *We are designed in the image of the Trinitarian God. By definition the Christian God exists in relationship as Father, Son, and Spirit. The Father gives himself for the Son, The Son gives himself for the Father. The gift of each other is personified in the Spirit. And not only do they give unconditionally, they receive each other in the same manner. It is perfect communion and union. (The Relational Soul, Plass and Cofield)
· *Genesis 2:18, “It is not good that man should be alone” God knew Adam needed communion and union with another human. Their maleness and femaleness became mutually life giving in many ways.
· *The fact that there is safety in a multitude of counselors (Proverbs 11:14) and the many other Proverbs instructing us on marriage, relationships, and friendship.
· *The 59 One Another Scriptures in the Bible are proof that we are meant to do life together.
· *God’s command to meet together on a regular basis with other believers. (Hebrews 10:45)
· *God’s invitation to commune with Him and to pray without ceasing. (1 Thessolonians 5:17)
· *The stories of orphans dying who are left in their beds and untouched.
· *That fact that our body releases the love hormone when we are hugged or hold hands with another person.
· **The uniquely intimate way in which the human male and human female bodies can unite during sexual intercourse.
· *Study infant development and your mind will be blown about how important the bond between a mother and infant are, for mother and infant thriving. Including oxytocin being released during labor and breastfeeding.
· * Oxytocin and the entire endocrine system!
· *Anxiety, depression, and cyber-bullying are at an all-time high in our culture and all of these things can be greatly reduced as we give up our dependence on screens.
I know that relationships are scary. BELIEVE ME, I know! I’m scared too. But when I take the risk to show up at church on Sunday, go to a party or gathering I’m invited to, experience a community event, or just have a conversation with a neighbor I don’t walk away with a glazed-over, empty look in my eye. I feel more alive!
So, I’m not arguing what is permissible or not, with regard to all the options available to us on screens and technology. I am saying CHOOSE TO BE ALIVE! CHOOSE TO FEEL THINGS as opposed to NUMBING and MINDLESS entertainment.
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. I Peter 5:8
You are not created for a life of isolation. You are created for the goodness of experiencing relationship with the Triune God, yourself, and other people. You need smiles. You need hugs. You need friends. You need feedback. This life is so beautiful. Our own bodies support the relational reality we were created for. Don’t miss it!
